Category Archives: SAGE ADVICE

Sage advice #2: Steppin’ on up

Hi Brundiggity,

I need your advice. My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months and we’ve only just said the L- word to each other. We talked about taking “the next step” but never really talked about what exactly that means. We see a lot of each other, we’ve met each others families, I really care about him, but I’m not sure I’m ready to take a big leap like moving in together. Is there  a commitment stepladder?

Help!
Looking for a stairway to heaven

Dear Looking,

Life is alot like stairs, there are steps and you climb them towards a destination. But what if you don’t know what the destination is? Or you’re uncertain about whether or not you really want to go there? Or what if you’re just tired of climbing and want to sit down for a while?  Well that’s why there are landings. In life sometimes you need to settle somewhere for a bit, catch your breath and enjoy the scenery, so do that. Don’t worry about the next step and what it is, there is not formal guide for what steps to take and when, you do what you feel is right, when you feel it’s right. So let this step, the L-word, be a landing until you decide whether or not you want to keep climbing.

Love,
Brundiggity

Sage advice #1: I like ‘em Cheap and Dirty

And now, the first in a series of answers to your (my loyal 3 readers’) questions:

 
I really like this guy, he has the greatest personality and sense of humor. and i feel completely comfortable talking to him about anything (even seriuos issues). So, ok, he’s not all that and a bag of chips when it comes to looks, but he’s sure as hell not bad looking either. the main issue though is that he still lives at home with his momma and he’s dirt cheap - and has no problem informing everyone else of this (i had to pay for my own meal on our first date)…there are other small issues here and there, but this is the major one…do i move on or stay for the ride?
 
Sincerely Tasha

 
 
 
Dear Tasha,
Does this boy have a job? Generally speaking  that helps in the whole paying for dinner thing. Perhaps he’s recently unemployed, after all we are in a recession, give the guy a break. Unless of course he’s sitting at home waiting for his Lionel Ritchie cover band to get discovered. If this is the case, then I suggest you walk away. Not slowly. Quickly. Very quickly. If he has a job, but is just cheap, well I know it’s crazy,but if you like him, you could embrace your roll as a modern woman and pay your own bill.  Just a thought.
 
Loves ya,
Brundiggity
 
 
 
Hello, is it me youre looking for?

Hello, is it me you're looking for?