So my life and I are at an odds right now. There’s a sort of fork in the road really, but not really, figuratively. Except, the fork is still kind of non-existent. 
So it’s more of a potential fork in the road. I don’t know that I can handle all this cutlery in my life right now since I’m only just getting used to the fact that my thumbs aren’t opposable (and no I’m not joking, I am a neanderthal).
Anyways, back to the point. Life and I need to have a talk, the serious kind, where I come home with a bottle of wine and get life a little bit tipsy before I break the bad news. What’s the bad news you ask? The bad news is I’m a little bit (read: a lot) disappointed with all the inconsistency and loops that life throws my way. I don’t want to jump anymore, or rephrase, if I have to jump through hoops I want to know that there’s some sort of pay out at the end worthy of the jumping.
So, get your shit together life cause otherwise we’re going to have some problems you and I, and quite frankly I like you, I don’t want for this to be a point of contention in our relationship. After all, we have so much potential.
